Follow(ing) the prophet, part 1

Not sure if it’s actually my least favorite, but among my least favorite Primary songs we have in the church is “Follow the Prophet”. (You really should follow the link to get an idea of how insipid it is. Listen to the audio, even—yeah, it’s that bad in real life, too.) I mean, not only does it sound awful, it’s a problematic message (if only because it assumes that everyone will automatically think of prophets the same way, which is wrong). Really bad is the chorus, which is nothing if not mindnumbing on many different levels (for maximum effect, imagine a huge choir of small children tunelessly shouting this in unison):

Follow the Prophet,
Follow the Prophet,
Follow the Prophet,
Don’t go astray!

Follow the Prophet,
Follow the Prophet,
Follow the Prophet.
He knows the way!

Therefore, i am eternally (and i really do mean that!) grateful to Raymond Bingham for providing an alternative chorus (and one that actually works well if you imagine a crowd of shouting kids):

Follow the Prophet,
Follow the Prophet,
Follow the Prophet,
Don’t burn in Hell!

Follow the Prophet,
Follow the Prophet,
Follow the Prophet,
He knows da*n well!

Makes the song almost listenable, i tell you.

(There are other issues i have with the song, too. Stay tuned.)

* Raymond had darn in his original version, other words have been used since then. Use your imagination.